Gear

In my endless, obsessive quest for gear reviews I sometimes take a look at foreign language sites which Google kindly autotranslates for me. It may just be me but I do find them insanely funny at times. Anyone else have some nice examples ?

One I looked at today (http://www.randonner-leger.org/forum/viewtopic.php?id=2915) includes the following:

"Upon request of Carn Mor Dearg our friend (and because I owed him that right after a failed act about a jacket from Berghaus Infinty ... ), Here is a small article on the tepee tents and GoLite Hex 3 from which I have.
So before any one tries to why this guy?
Before any base to plusiseurs! And it whatever the weather!
A tent is good but to house several hours during the long winter nights must be trained in yoga and be prepared to bear heavy.
A tarp is nice but in winter it lacks usability, especially when everyone is wrapped up in his sleeping bag and outer bag (we do not even speak here of the difficulty to face inclement conditions ...)
A tent tepee to the advantage of being roomy, friendly and with a small candle uco it becomes a place to live.
That's the good side, a bit sensitive to the thing, go to the art.
I opted for a teepee ultralight landed on the snow because we can dig a pit and gain valuable volume (again!).
Secondly and most importantly it is a very simple and very good profile to undergo proper snowfall (now tell me ...). Pyramidal shape prevents any accumulation of snow and it falls quietly at the foot of the tipi.
After it is clear that the relative floor space and floor space is at a disadvantage but we must say that it is so big that it poses no problem."

a central mast, sardines and titanium shrouds. a resealable scratch!

Then measures the beautiful (the weight because I have not measured the size):
-800 G canvas only
-389 G the central mast
-143 G sardines in the 9 angles.

The big advantage is that you can connect two sticks together with a strap or twine (you need a helping hand but it takes). The advantage of hiking sticks is that they are more flexible than the original mat. The wind resistance is then improved without risking tearing or removal of the sardines.
Sardines are good quality but I would prefer my sardines titanium for use outside the snow (in the snow, the rest of the strand by strand sticks to be more appropriate).
It comes two guys who have their utility as high winds or heavy snowfall.
Note that the Hex is perfect for 3 people to live and sleep. But if there is a branch a little high or we can lend a crodelette between two points, it avoids using the mat acrochant the cord to the ring at the top of the tipi. In this case we can easily accommodate 4 without too much problem.
The fabric used is a good weight silnylon (60g / m²) which really gives confidence. The seams are not coated and as usual, is the consumer to do so. Small difference compared to other products, GoLite ensures that the wire tends to swell on contact with water and microwave caulk holes making sewing seams waterproof. I truly do not yet fully tested this setting but it seems correct for the short rains (mist) that I had.
I'm thinking to customize the web to get a stove pipe. In this case I think sewing a piece of fiberglass with a resealable scratch (in case I will take no stove). But as I have not found or constructed stove wait a little longer.
Clearly I am very happy with this purchase. For about 850 g (with sardines and titanium shrouds) I think it's a 4 season shelter (excluding extremes) for 3 people quite friendly and adapted.

Do you know if the sardines come in tomato sauce?

Later on we have

"In high winds there is a sport!"

Maybe that's due to too many sardines...

Thanks Geoff,

Best laugh I've had for quite some time (it's a sad life I lead)

Titanium shroud must be some burial ritual I haven't heard of, should keep the worms  out.

Sardines titanium that'll test the NHS dentures.

'Tends to swell on contact with water.' Cold water has the opposite effect with me.

i'd guess French... Very poetic, with the sardines echoing Mr Cantona's seagulls following a trawler.