Britain's Mountains Closed Shock!

Britain's mountains were sensationally closed yesterday after several millimetres of snow fell on them, OUTDOORSmagic can exclusively reveal.

Traffic on mountain footpaths ground to a halt as the snow compacted into slightly slippery layer in low temperatures. Queues of walkers were forced to wait where they came to a halt as mountain rescuers battled through the dusting of white stuff and attempted to clear the way ahead.

Mountain Rescue Teams have responded angrily to government accusations that they failed to heed foul weather warnings and grit mountain paths. 'We didn't expect snow,' said one rescue team member. 'It's not happened in living memory.'

Meanwhile a spokesperson for the Byways Agency intimated the the government may consider making gritting of mountain paths compulsory whenever the Met Office mentions the word 'snow' more than twice in a single forecast.

OUTDOORSmagic editor Jon Doran commented: 'I'm bored now. Isn't it about time southerners learned to cope with snow? Soft gits the lot of them.' Jon was born in London.